Carlito's Way (1993)

  The story follows Carlito, a Puerto Rican mobster who just got out of prison. His notorious name and deeds get in his way of trying to stay away from his dark past while he struggles to clear his name and start fresh. His dealings with an ambitious and dirty lawyer stall even longer his getting away from New York for a new place and life...
  Brian De Palma has a secret but easily recognizable recipe for a crime drama film! Carlito's way follows paths that had already proven successful with Scarface but still, De Palma manages to create a fresh crime classic. Carlito's way focuses not only on the face-value of  sex, drugs and rock n' roll of the mafia life but also on the vanity and pain that surrounds such a lifestyle. Topped up with a mood-setting soundtrack and a nostalgic-y cinematography, this film makes for an instant viewing pleasure.
  Not much needs to be said about Pacino's acting on this one or in general. You get what you expect ; a solid performance of a character that is both a cruel son-of-a-bitch and a lover too. Sean Penn, on the other hand, is what really catches the eye. His personification of the lawyer that's much too eager to get his hands dirty but doesn't really have the balls for it is really something unique. Penelope Ann Miller also contributes an extra something to the plot as the girl madly in love with Carlito but so out of anything criminal that it hurts just to see them together.
Must watch this : on a hot summer night together with four hefty glasses of your choice of poison. Getting a bit drunk will help you get the feels with this movie even more. Just be careful of the ending! The real lesson of the movie is Regret Nothing but Regret Everything!
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0106519/?ref_=nv_sr_1

I know how you feel but we will try to get back that teddy bear

"Damn, that was spicy" "Who dat?" "Did I really turn off the oven?"

"Bye, Felicia"

Sorceress (1982)

  Evil wizard Traigon must sacrifice his firstborn child to a dark deity. His wife disagrees and in order to save her twin daughters, she runs away from him. The two girls grow up by the side of a warrior named Krona who protects and trains them. After twenty years of absence, Traigon returns and he sets out to finish the job; to sacrifice his daughters...
  After an hour and a half, I was still looking for a Sorceress but she was nowhere to be found. Anyway! Sorceress is an early 80's Sword&Sandal epic (?) movie directed by legendary cult director Jack Hill and produced by Roger Corman. Rumor has it that Corman interfered so much in the editing that Hill was disappointed and decided to remove his name in the credits as a director. You can really sense that this movie was put together really fast in order to cash in on Conan's success as a film of the same genre. Unfortunately, in that token, Sorceress does not cut it but at least it provides with 83 minutes of pure B-movie fun. It is filled with clever sexual innuendos, cheap but entertaining 80's special effects and costumes, a fair amount of action and fantastic beasts and alive things (sic) inspired by almost any "epic" era or tale you can imagine. Some may not be huge fans of "All-In-One" soups like this but I certainly had fun.
  Except from the sexy blonde twins, Leigh & Lynette Harris (ex-Playboy Playmates), almost everyone else is Mexican. It makes sense since the film was shot in Mexico in order to ensure lower production costs. Roberto Ballesteros plays the evil father/wizard, Bruno Rey is Baldar, David Millbern is Pando (my personal favorite, a Satyr) and Roberto Nelson is Elrick. For a B-movie such as this, the overall acting quality is actually above average and very convincing throughout the entire film. The actors certainly did more than they had to, that's for sure!
Should you or should you not watch this? I don't know...Do you want to see a half-man/half-goat getting all voyeur-y on a couple of naked blonde twins swimming in a lake? Do you want to see what the cheapest special effects in 1982 could produce? Then, the answer is clear!
Must watch this :  on a lazy, bored Sunday afternoon after you have enjoyed a hefty BBQ lunch. Grab a soda and tune in on that shit. For the afterburner, blast this!
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0086340/

20 years early for a Gimli tryout, dude, but i like your effort!

How did my life end up like this?

It is not obvious what I am supposed to be but it is obvious that I am

The Astro-Zombies (1968)

  Dr. DeMarco conducts his morbid experiments secretly while attempting to create humanoids put together from various body parts with the ultimate goal of controlling them using his electronic devises.  When one if his creations escapes, it sets off on a killing spree and draws the attention of the F.B.I, the C.I.A and other agencies. While everyone is trying to stop him, the mad doctor puts every effort in fulfilling his goal...
  Given the fact that Ted V. Mikels directed this one, it does not strike as a surprise to anyone who watches this film as to why this film is like that. Don't get me wrong, though. This film has every little aspect that guarantees a Z-rate cult film success and that is pretty much everything in small doses. Little bit of Science-Fiction,a little bit of Gore, a pinch of Spy/Mystery adventure and if you add to that a strong essence of Psychedelia then you get AstroZombies. Sadly, the film lacks a strong amount of any of its aforementioned elements to reciprocate for plotholes and a absurd storyline. But even so, AstroZombies does not get crappy enough to be labeled as "Must not watch this". You just need enough psychoactive substances, I guess...
  To be honest, that main thing that draw my attention to this flick (and I am guessing most people's out there) is the fact that Tura Satana has a role in it. Plus, the fact that it is one of the last films that Wendell Corey appears in. For those that don't know, Tura Satana played the iconic role in Faster! Pussycat! Kill! Kill! and Corey had a long career in both cinema and television. John Carradine (another well-respected actor with a long career) plays the mad scientist and it makes sense that the plot revolves around him too. Additional roles by Tom Pace and Joan Patrick. Thumbs up for the humanoid and the original poster artwork. They really had me there!
Must watch this : strictly for the thrill of it! I mean, come on, it has everything you need to fill a good 92 minutes. Enough action to not let you get bored, enough psychedelic dancing (?) and goodlooking ladies and enough fake science theories and gore. Just make sure there is enough cider in the fridge to go with the flick. Sour and sparkly as they are both.
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0064048/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

When you eyelash game is on point *SLAY*

Bang, Bang. She shot me down!

If I keep starring at it then maybe I may seem more convincing

Check to the Queen (1969) a.k.a Scacco Alla Regina

  A disappointed young wife, bored with her life, decides to work for a strange actor/model for as long as her husband is away for business. Her duty is to assist the "signora" with anything she desires on a daily basis and, most of al, tolerate her obnoxious character without a complaint. But as their weird employer-employee relationship progresses, X will find out the darker truth inside herself; that she is only happy when she is dominated...
  Pasquale Festa Campanile is the director of this beautiful Italian film and I must admit I was not aware of his work before I watched it. The flick follows a classic recipe of Italian giallo without being a giallo ; the mood, the color, the music, the atmosphere are all there minus the "thriller" characteristic. No, "Scacco Alla Regina" is somewhere out there without fitting into an exact category ; sometimes humorous, somewhat cheesy, kinda sexy, surely classy and psychedelic, so...Yeah! You get the point. Hands down, this is a good film, not boring at all and certainly lets time flow but keeps you focused. Highly recommended for those bored of typical films about sexual and sensual domination!
  Since this is an Italian flick, I think I do not need to make a big introduction about the cast of the film, especially the ladies! Get ready to feast your eyes on some superb examples of what a Italian "donna" is. Our lady viewers can also find their prince here too, so better notes. Rosanna Schiaffino, Haydee' Politoff, Romolo Valli, Aldo Giuffre and Daniela Surina. Easy-going characters (well mostly) played by breezy actors so in the end you get a very smooth result. Don't expect any hardcore stuff here in terms of domination, only vanilla, stylish and everyday kinky vices. You gotta love that you will hate (and hate that you will love) the domina in this film, though! She is totally convincing and would definitely persuade you to obey her, for sure!
Must watch this : when you move into your first, new house. Let the exhaustion of moving and carrying all your things carry you in a chill out mood. Pour yourself some cold Vinsanto and enjoy!
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0166789/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

So, I told him " Well, yes, love! I am coming down immediately". And, yeah, he is downstairs waitin' 

There! Now you are a complete bowl of fruits!

Take that, you cheeky cunt!

Pit Stop (1969)

  Rick Bowman, a car junkie and speed addict, is approached by a shady guy who wants to sponsor him to participate in a new form of automobile racing, the Figure 8. This is a very dangerous kind of sport as the risks of crashing and getting killed is the actual point of it all. Rick will face his arch enemy and try to make it out alive...
  Jack Hill is a very respectable director and writer of the celluloid underground. Throughout the years he found his perfect balance of sleaze, trash and exploitation, all boosted by an aspiration to become something greater. Hence his films have a more "normal" feel to them than the average B-movie. His greatest achievements, though, were his contribution to the Blaxploitation genre and this film is just 3 years before that! By that token, Pit Stop should interest even as little as to see the progress he would later make. Of course, it is more than that...
  The cast some interesting appearances. It is the kind of cast that wanted something bigger for themselves although certain factors contributed to that never happening during their career. And you can feel and see that in their eyes. And you can imagine them at the same time as you are watching this film, sitting on their couch, reminiscing, with the whole nostalgic,melancholic Tarantinesque vibe. But, that is still OK, because people like Richard Davalos, Ellen Burstyn, Sid Haig, Beverly Washburn and Brian Donlevy are the actual everyday heroes we need to keep it going. To remind us that dreams are out there to be chased even if the chase is as vain as a car racing and chasing the sun...
Must watch this : on a hot spring Sunday morning. After the film, expect an unbeatable urge to get in your car,turn that key around and drive for as far as the tank can take ya!
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0064819/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

Sponsorship, hmmm?!So, what kind of cash you willing to give?!

Girlfriend's face when you do a stunt with the car and risk getting killed *that moment right before*

We don't no need no brakes, mister. Take 'em off!

Blood Feast (1963)

  Suburban Miami during the 60's. An elegant lady is organizing a celebratory feast and decides to ask the help of a local, highly recommended caterer. Only this is no ordinary caterer and he will do anything to collec the body parts he needs in order to wake an ancient Egyptian goddess back to life...
  Man, how do I love these films?! When everyone sees just another ultra low fidelity, super cheap and sleazy shitty film, I see a revolution. An involuntary one, to be exact. Sure, this is another one of those cheap films that geeks only watch, but see how easily Herschell Gordon Lewis spits in the eye of the politically correct society and demeanor of his times. See how breezily he does not try to convince you of his artistic talent but rather grab you by the hair and drag you down the path that is Z-grade cinema, free of pretention, art for art. And when art is done for art, you know it has absolutely no meaning!
  Mal Arnold is the sick caterer with the dark motives, Connie Mason is the little innocent sacrificial (sic) lamb (and boy how soft her flesh looks), Lyn Bolton is her mother who unbeknown to her  has let the Egyptian slayer in their house and William Kerwin is the man who can put an end to it all! No tricks here, what you see is what you get. Raw acting or even raw absence of acting but the feeling is right. Downright filthy, straigt-edge cult! Dig in!
Must watch this : extra large portion of lamb chops, a big bowl of lettuce on the side (you gotta get those fibers,baby!) and a glass of brandy. You are going to need that taste of blood in your mouth while watching this gem!
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0056875/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

Gee! You are a real butcher...with your prices!

When you wrap some meat up for a meat roll-up. Mmmmm!

But, baby! I just could not resist that ass!

Hannibal (2001)

  Hannibal Lecter now lives in self-exile in Italy. FBI agent Clarice Starling now has to face all the weight of the disgrace from Lecter's open case. A previous victim with enough power and connections will claim revenge on Lecter and once again the trail of blood continues...
  Ridley Scott decides to go big with the followup on Silence of the Lambs. Though not as good the its predecessor, Hannibal does maintain the same air of a quality thriller. We are left to discover more extensively the intriguing character of Hannibal and probably delve deeper into his "twisted" sense of reality. Extra points for the Rome scenes, class and history together with raw violence and blood ! Magnifico!
  Anthony Hopkins is truly a unique actor. Every role he has played, he made it into something really authentic ; always a wise, intelligent, classy man with respect to women. And it's interesting here too that all these attributes are accustomed to a cannibal! Julianne Moore for some reason breaks my nerves so I can't be a good judge of her. Ray Liotta is purely entertaining especially in the end while  Gary Oldman has a special appearance too! Don't miss it!
Must watch this : strictly with Tartar steak and a good double brewed strong ale. For iron stomachs only!
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0212985/?ref_=fn_al_tt_2

Got shaved too fast. Now I am full of scars. Can you tell?

Is that a sandwich?

Me & my friends entering a restaurant