Frankenstein (1931)

  The classic story we all love. Heinrich "Henry" Frankenstein, half-lunatic half-genius scientist and his assistant Fritz collect pieces of dead bodies. Their plan is to make a human being entirely out of these "spare" parts and bring it to life through electrical devices.
  James Whale. old-school director with balls takes on the bet of providing a decent depiction of the classic story. He says "Fuck it. I'm gonna make that shit an instant classic, take that shit to another level". And thankfully he did. Take off your hats to the movie that brought the legend to its new era, the film that 82 years later still has the same effect it had back then.
  A parade of talent and awesomeness here. Colin Clive, as the demented,work-obsessed Dr. Frankenstein, Dwight Frye, his hunchback assistant with a morbid figure, Mae Clarke, as Elizabeth Would-be-Frankenstein and of course the very best Boris Karloff as the monster. Do yourself a favor and watch this.
Must watch this : with a plate of good old beef goulash, a pint of well-brewed dark beer straight from the barrel and a pipe full of heavenly-scented tobacco.
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0021884/

Raidin' graves under a Death statue. Yikes!

That shit could use a manicure

Come at me,brozenstein!

 

Virgin Witch (1972)

  Young, aspiring model Christine gets her big chance at a modelling career when she is called for shooting at a castle. She and her sister Betty go on this crazy weekend, only to find that their hosts had other plans for Christine as they were aiming at inducting her at their witch coven. Little did they know that Christine had other plans too...
  Prolific TV director Ray Austin gives us this classic piece of British horror and exploitation. Interesting story with a classic twist (classic for its time, nowadays it would be ridiculous), beautiful landscape and castle scenes and above all saucy, devilish women! My favorite parts of course are the sacredly performed coven rituals (more like motives for orgies) and all that foggy, sex-scented air of the film.
  The big deal here are the Michelle twins, Ann and Vicki,who play sisters Christine and Betty. One is good,one is bad but both are out for all they can grab. Patricia Haines also chips in as the the lesbian boss of the model agency, cult in her own way and Neil Hallett as the the shady coven leader. Seductive and witchy soundtrack, too. Check this one out!
Must watch this : in a house in a rural area,on a windy night with a lit fire in the fireplace, a nice cup of chocolate in hand and a naughty temptress by your side covered up with her quilt blanket!
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0069464/

It's lesbian play time, honey!

Take a bite of this apple

And a-one, a-two,a-three four five

Mudhoney (1965)

  1933. U.S.A in Depression and Prohibition. Calif, a stranger with a hidden past on his way to California, is hired by Lute Wade in Missouri in order to get some traveling money. Calif falls in love with Lute's daughter, Hannah, but her no-good drunk husband, Sidney, stands in the way. Sidney soon turns the town against Calif with the help of a mad preacher, while he is out to get Lute's inheritance. Violence and passions breaks out!
  Yet another classic by master Russ Meyer. All the classic elements of Meyer-istic film-making dance around in this film too but it somehow feels a little bit different. Maybe because there is an extra touch of drama and desperation, blending perfectly with the era of the story. A must-see for self-respecting viewers.
  Standard Meyer cast! Hal Hopper, John Furlong, Antoinette Cristiani, Stuart Lancaster and Frank Bolger. Run-down characters in a messed-up time trying to find their way to salvation! My personal highlight is the preacher's wife, Lee Ballard! Ultra hot and buxotic. My personal fantasy!
Must watch this :  on a hot Saturday night, right before you go out, with some good bourbon on the rocks. Nothing beats that feeling.
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0059477/?ref_=ttpl_pl_tt

Playing with my pussy

This is an intervention, Hannah. Cut the weed!

Sister Hansen. I would let her preach me all right!

 

Phase IV (1974)

  Desert ants show some interesting signs of intelligence within a group. They start posing a threat to desert  inhabitants, claiming their territory. Two scientists are assigned to the case and they need to study this rare incident and find a way to stop it with the help of a stray girl that they rescued. But as they struggle to bend nature's will (or reaction), they find that things are much more complex than they thought.
  Saul Bass's only full-length attempt at directing certainly pays off. A classic 70's sci-fi, eco film with strong character evolution and a story that takes up a lot of thinking afterwards. Incredible close-ups on the ants, strong scientific basis, low-budget but artistically filmed. This is Sci-Fi, the old-school way.
  Michael Murphy and Nigel Davenport play the dynamic scientist duo that takes on saving the world while performing serious experiments and surveys. Each of the character's complexes and egoism is brought up and clashes with each other in these great performances. Lynne Frederick fills up the remaining spots as a necessary female role.
Must watch this : suggest it to your science teacher at school or university and suggest a group viewing. After you get rejected, watch it by yourself with a milkshake or with a friend with whom you can talk seriously afterwards. Reach the conclusion that human is a no-good plague that fell on the Earth and sit in silence.
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0070531/

Majestic

Yer, he is dead

Will you stop blazing it for fucks sake? I can't see shit.

Dear God No ! (2011)

  A gang of bloodthirsty, alcohol-drug-thirsty bikers, called The Impalers, go on their usual rampage, killing, raping, abusing substances etc. Their way takes them to a scientist's house where they conduct their usual tricks. Until they find out that the scientist has ties with the Nazi party and a many more secrets better left hidden...
  James Bickert is behind this well hidden, ballsy jewel. This is the real deal! Real grindhouse and pure exploitation in a time that this genre seems to be forgotten. Bikers, Nazis, monsters, drugs, alcohol, naked women and tons of cheesiness, this is as good as it gets in our days. Shocking cinema for prude modern audiences filled up to the neck with the references you love.
  Jett Bryant, the no-good son-of-a-bitch in lead of the gang. Paul McComiskey, the distorted Nazi scientist.
Olivia LaCroix, his hot Nazi wife and Madeline Brumby as his even-hotter, always-horny daughter! Impressive performances from actors that do not lack in self-sarcasm and are not afraid to break the rules! A big congratulations for them by me!
Must watch this : on a rainy Sunday morning with a good caramel cappuccino and the company of an always-horny girl. After the film, proceed to some animalistic, twisted sex under the tunes of White Zombie.
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1947998/

Priceless visual entertainment

Dance, bitch!

Where will you be when period strikes?

  

First Blood (1982)

  John Rambo, a Vietnam war veteran, returns to the states looking for a new start but all he finds is disappointment. When a small town sheriff arrests and abuses him, everything changes. War memories, still warm, fight their way out and Rambo is out for revenge. They will be sorry they drew first blood.
  The one, the only, the pentacle in 80's action films and a basis for every other action film that followed. Rambo, directed by Ted Kotcheff, with enough doses of drama and social concern but with even more doses of hard-boiled action and suspense. A country trying to heal its social wounds from a fresh war, a loner with no point in life, the thin line between these two and pure violence! That, my friends, is exploitation!
  Sylvester Stallone, Brian Dennehy and Richard Crenna in the middle. The good , the bad and the diplomat. A challenge of who has bigger balls only this time they take to until death, all harmonically twisted in rural America. This movie is so full by the testosterone of their performances that ladies may be in danger of growing facial hair while watching it. If you haven't started needing a razor, this might be a good start.
Must watch this : with tons of beer and even more tons of pizza, on a rainy autumn night with the dudes. Adding some girls to your company may be fun as they will make fun all the time. But that is fine because you can shut them up with your excessive testosterone!
*Specially devoted to Silent Guardian
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0083944/

Getting real tired of yo shit, fat boy

Tank top in -2 Celsius? Who gives a fuck?

Imma blast yo ass

The Brides of Dracula (1960)

  Van Helsing, the known vampire hunter, returns to Transylvania in order to save the day once again. A young and innocent teacher on her way to her new position, sets free the horrors of the vampires by mistake. A seemingly easy task for Van Helsing, but will he make it?
  Hammer Films and quality horror stories go together like cocaine and waffles. Nothing can go wrong with Terence Fisher on the wheel, Price in the lead and a couple of classy female characters! The Gothic-Baroque vibe is intense, the dialogues are strong and sophisticated, the characters well-developed and the story imaginative and horrifying. And just for the thrill, you also get some young, sophisticated ladies to fill up the secondary roles.
  Peter Cushing, David Peel, Martita Hunt, Freda Jackson, Yvonne Monlaur and all the rest. All actors of a time long gone, actors of a different breed and culture for whom a role was their life. I can't write too much or I risk ruining their significance. Just watch the film and judge for yourself.
Must watch this : after a trip to Central Europe, maybe Czech Republic. Get all the Gothic and Baroque atmosphere you can, mix with memories of people and places from this trip and blend with a high-potent well-prepared glass of absinthe.
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0053677/?ref_=nv_sr_1

Shady motthafucka with a mustache eyefuckin' the shit out of you

Such a shame...

Is there something in my teeth?

Werewolf Woman (1976) a.k.a La Lupa Mannara

  A young woman, who was raped as a child, convinces herself she is a werewolf. She goes out at night, finds men, has sex with them and the she rips their throat out with her teeth. In a twist of events, she falls in love but her lover is killed and she is raped once again. Look out she is coming for revenge!
  Eurosleaze and EuroHorror director Rino Di Silvestro puts his mark on this one. A very interesting film indeed with a title that may have you think otherwise. Don't expect the usual paranormal-supernatural horror movie. This one here dares to swim in the dangerous waters of psychological thriller! With enough nudity and sex to make think otherwise, this film does indeed approach the story in a more serious ways while exploiting it! See for yourself.
  Annik Borel is the werewolf woman and she is really something. Crazy eyes, maniac movement and insatiable sex drive, all wrapped up in a tiny little body. Plus, the transformation sequence from woman to werewolf works pretty cool on her. Beautiful European sets, tons of sex, a twisted story like no other, what are you still waiting for?
Must watch this : with a lady friend on her period (for obvious reasons) and some good Italian pasta. All following consequences are sure to shock you.
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0074829/

Dancing naked in a ring of fire? A-What up

A true sailor is not afraid of the red sea, Michael

Delicioso

     

Tortured Females (1965)

  A fully-buxom young blonde, Helen, is snatched by Mr. Big and his accomplish while she leisurely goes skinny-dipping in a lake in the woods. She is taken to a ranch nearby where she finds out that other women are held as well. The girls are used by Mr. Big to indulge his sick pleasures, until Helen decides to escape.
  Arch Hudson's short-time directing career gleefully started with this flick here and ended the following year! Nonetheless, he let his own personal touch in the vibrant world of sexploitation. Nothing too special with this film here, only that it has a weird freaky vibe in it. I got the feeling that something was wrong, something lurking in the air, something threatening and sinister. But maybe it was just me.
  Denine Du Bois is the celebrated star of the film, playing Helen of course. With a figure much better than her acting, I must agree she is the star of the film and blends perfectly with the rest of the female cast. Arnold Black plays their sadistic captor. Not that he is too much of an actor. Just to put it out there.
Must watch this : in between two Russ Meyer films, chilling with the dudes.
Movie Part
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0259675/

Come on, Bogs. Look lively

Little White Riding Hood

Niggas gotta run now

The Woman (2011)

  A successful country lawyer finds a young woman alienated from modern society in the woods while hunting and captures her with the intention of "civilizing" her.This will put his family in danger and threaten to bring out his biggest secrets. Who is the civilized one in the end?
  Following the story of the film Offspring (2009), Lucky McKee directs this interesting piece of exploitation. You don't need to see Offspring to follow the plot as this film can perfectly stand on its own as a social survey! Interesting character build-up, gloomy countryside sets and a twisty brutal story of social conformation. People=Shit
   Pollyanna McIntosh plays "The Woman" and she is really good at it, with her grunts and growls and everything animalistic about it! You also got to love Sean Bridgers as the lawyer/father/sociopathic little fuck . Intense performances, independent ballsy atmosphere and a good-vibe soundtrack!
Must watch this : alone with a glass of juice on a random day. Then fall in deep thoughts about social progress and get depressed.
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1714208/

Good Will Hunting

That shit is no carrot

Come here doggie!

The Revenge of The Living Dead Girls (1987) a.k.a La Revanche Des Mortes Vivantes

  A small town's milk supply is contaminated with a deadly chemical causing the death of three girls. The chemical company responsible for the chemical tries to get rid of the waste and gives the job to a local guy who dumps it in the local cemetery. The chemical brings the three dead girls back to life and they are out for revenge!
  Pierre B. Reinhard, a master of French and European sleaze, directs this masterpiece often celebrated as the first French gore horror film. A story worth of the film's title, amazing sets, lots of nudity (it's a French film so it makes sense) and a bulk of well portrayed gore! It may seem too sleazy and cheap for a film of its genre but it certainly pays off. Plus, that cheap-looking European glowy color in the film's photography is over the top and brings another air in the zombie genre! Total decadence!
  Acting is not a huge deal here. Female actors are either nude, having sex or dead (hue hue!) while the male ones try to much to be the macho type. Surprisingly, the zombie women move quite good for zombies making realistic enough to set aside the negatives!
Must watch this : on a cold November night or on Halloween, with a glass of milk (get it?!). After the film, try and convince a girl friend to let you bury her in the woods and shoot photographs. Of course, she has to be naked!
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091847/

Dead

Naked

Or trying to have sex!

 



 

Black Mama, White Mama (1973)

  When female inmates Lee Daniels (a former harem girl) and Karen Brent (a revolutionary) don't get along and cause a mess, they are chained together in an attempt to a forced get-along by their sadistic matron Densmore. Even so, they manage to escape in the vast wilderness of Philippines jungle and in their attempts to save their lives they bring a hot escalation in the war between local revolutionaries and gangsters.
  Better than average attempt at a Women-In-Prison film by Eddie Romero. Interesting plot and sets (Philippines bring another air of decadence in the mood of the film for me), quality acting and tons of exploitation. Female violence, lesbianism and sadism, nudity, oppressive conditions and more violence!
  Top-notch performances by top-notch exploitation actors Lynn Borden, Margaret Markov, Sid Haig and the goddess Pam Grier. I may be predisposed about her but the fact is that without her this movie would suck (more than it does--in the good way) like so many others. Her dark complexion goes perfect in the natural green environment and of course you can't say female power without her name in the same sentence.
Must watch this : after a good Sunday lunch when you just want to chill. Invite a female friend and let her demonstrate her wrestling skills and power on you. Goes well with a cold, cheap beer.
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0068282/

Peeping time

What did you say about me, white bitch?

I just slipped into something casual for the gun fight. My eyes are up here!

Alice In Acidland (1969)

  Innocent college girls Alice and Kathy are invited to a seemingly innocent, good-time party by Frieda. In a sudden twist of events, innocent-no-more Alice and Kathy get drunk and high on marijuana and LSD and explore the vast depths of their suppressed sexuality.
  Downright obscure oddity in the style of documentary/softcore/shocker. Directed by John Donne, this beauty comes straight from a time when out-of-the-norm sexual behavior was considered vice and a product of strong drug abuse. See modern Alice's trip into total depravity and daze!
  Sheri Jackson plays the Alice of the title but originally this film had no credited cast. You get some pretty "strong" performances in this film, in emotionally tensed scenes such as lesbian intercourse, various drug abuse and major ball tripping, rape, hardcore partying and all other elements you are dying to see in such films.
Must watch this : high or drunk on a hot summer evening with the appropriate amount of female friends in equal state of highness.
Film Opening
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0159948/

Having such an innocent good time

No, Johnnie. Use your other hand

420