The Blood of Fu Manchu (1968)

  Fu Manchu has found a strange species of snake whose venom only affects. In his powerful master plan, he inoculates ten women with this venom in order to poison ten male leaders, bring chaos in the world and eventually preparing millions of doses for his world domination...
  Even on meager budget Jess Franco once again proves not only that he can make a film but also that he can make a good film without depending too much on nudity and drugs. Exploiting the persona of the notorious villain Fu Manchu, Franco creates a thrilling adventure with intense scenes, of course a minimum amount of nudity and epic pulp characters and dialogues. Another underground classic by a perverted mind...
  Much of the film's success (or call it whatever you want) depends and can be attributed to Christopher Lee. Even under shitty situation and sarcastic roles, Lee manages to sustain a classy character and dominate most of the space that he can take. And since it's a Franco film, presences like Maria Rohm, Loni von Friedl, Shirley Eaton and Tsai Chin could not be absent!
Must watch this :  with your stoner friends, a bowl half-full of the best Buddha Haze you can find and sugar-full soda drinks! Get high, get cranked and start growing Fu Manchu beards under the tunes of those fuzzy bastards.
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0062741/

Dat ass!

Bubble butt, bubble bubble bubble butt

You definitely don't look Chinese!

Kiss Me Monster (1969) a.k.a Küß Mich, Monster

  Sexy secret agents Diana and Regina are once again on a secret mission. Following the mysterious trail of a deadly message, the two spies travel to a Caribbean island and seek the traces of a secret society called Abilene that acts in absolute secrecy. Accepting their new mission from Abilene, they will soon find that that end of the mystery is nowhere near...
  Much like Sadist Erotica, Kiss Me Monster is an unorthodox spy spoof film by none other than the notorious Jess Franco. Instead of ultra macho men spies you get two ultra bimbo women spies with an awful taste for a high-class living. Surreal at most of its parts, unbelievable in others, this film guarantees a cheap quality amount of time with a groovy psychedelic soundtrack and the minimum amount of nudity that a Franco film can stand. If you can dig it, dive in!
  Janine Reynaud and Rosanna Yanni are the protagonist super-spy duo. Don't get fooled though. They certainly don't pass for any spies but they can easily go for high maintenance divas. It's not in the purpose of the film to make them look like spies either! Never afraid of danger and always seducing everything in their way they go on and solve the case with or without the help of Chris Howland, Michel Lemoine and Manuel Velasco.
Must watch this : on a hot and slow summer afternoon with a cocktail hard enough to make this movie sufferable! After the film, find the nearest swimming pool and go chill!
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0061432/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

"Play Smells like teen spirit" "No."

Leave the stage like a lady

We must be getting near Amsterdam

Vampyros Lesbos (1971)

  Linda Westinghouse works in a Turkish legal firm and is often troubled with erotic nightmares about a sexy female vampire that seduces her. When she gets assigned on the case of Countess Nadine Carody, Linda recognizes in her the vampire of her dreams.Is Linda losing her mind or is it all happening?
  Summer has deeply kicked in around here and the only thing better than a cold beer is a Jess Franco film about lesbian vampires,trippy psychedelia and erotic atmosphere. Using his well-known techniques, Franco manages to emphasize on the beauty of the woman body creating a picturesque result without falling into the trap of porn. Dreamy sequences, hazy mood, a pure 60's psychedelic soundtrack by Siegfried Schwab and a plot that is exploitative enough will definitely make you lose your mind.
  Ewa Strömberg is Linda, a pretty young lady who is gets hunted by the seducing vampire Countess Nadine, beautifully played by Soledad Miranda. Both actresses display some very theatrical talent in their performances but undoubtedly Soledad stands out for the incredible look in her eyes. Something between "high beyond all points" and "horny as hell" that surely made Dennis Price fall for her charm and powers.
Must watch this : after you have consumed a hefty amount of bad quality alcohol, a pack of cigarettes and a manly joint, allow yourself to be drowned in this film's heavy smoke on a random hot summer night. Cool off with a ride in your car and this fucker blasting !
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0066380/.

First 3 minutes in the film...It's gonna be good

I am leaving you, Mary, for Pierre. He is a much better lover!

Are those real?

Swedish Nympho Slaves (1977) a.k.a Die Sklavinnen

  A father and his right hand pay a handful amount of money in order to get back the father's kidnapped daughter. The kidnappers never return the daughter so they kidnap a whorehouse owner whom the police have been trying to get for years. Now it is time for some answers...
  Jess Franco hits again. With Erwin C. Dietrich by his side as a writer and producer, Franco goes big this time as the money flows. Same old cast and same old Franco-style progress guarantee an entertaining plunge into the abyss of sleazy bars and whorehouses, drugs, money and sex. Franco was never a director for whom people would have a certain idea. Same goes here. If you didn't like him anyway, you willhate him for this film. If you liked him, now you will love him.
  Lina Romay is (guess what) the whorehouse master, Madame Arminda, and deals heavily with prostitutes and drugs.Of course, she is naked throughout most of the film. Martine Stedil is the poor daughter who got caught up in the web and a cult Vítor Mendes is her father. Jess Franco appears in this too, as always, as the father's goon. Attention : full frontal nudity or semi-full frontal nudity is profound in this film so watch at your own risk!
Must watch this : on a slow-paced evening, summer or spring. Open your window to let the sounds of the city come in, open up a cheap beer and submerge in this film like you would submerge in a pool with hot, steamy water. After the film, listen to that sick mofo to wake you up from the haze!
Whole Film
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0193510/

Okay, I swear I did not leave my kitchen!

I should have never left school

What the fuck am I doing here?

Diary of a Nymphomaniac (1973) a.k.a Le Journal Intime D'Une Nymphomane

  A young girl, Linda, works at a bar as part of a lesbian duo show. One night she picks up Ortiz from the bar, seduces him to her room and proceeds to commit suicide right after calling the police. Ortiz is suddenly held responsible for her death. But dark secrets are about to unfold and Ortiz may not be so innocent after all...
  Jess Franco is one nasty motherfucker and he proves it anyway he can. 41 years before Lars von Trier, Franco gives us his own version of what a nympho is and the result really blows your mind. Dreamy photography as the camera idly and drunk swings among the delinquent characters in this poem of European sensual filth!
  Montserrat Prous plays the seductive Linda and Manuel Pereiro is the unlucky Ortiz who probably got what he deserved. Mixed up in this is also Ortiz's wife played by Jacqueline Laurent, a lesbian countess played by Anne Libert and Linda's partner Maria Toledano impersonated by Kali Hansa. All blend perfectly and make this movies the perverted masterpiece it is. As usual, most female actors are nude or semi-nude throughout the film, so prude douchebags and extreme feminists back off! This is for the open minded! 
Must watch this : right when summer starts making its first appearances. Set the mood with that saucy temptress, get a cocktail or just a beer and get high on this film, thinking of all the sex you are (not) going to have this summer. Daydream of how it would be to meet a nympho and how it would affect. Who knows, you might even get lucky!
Excerpt
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0069973/

You know this movie is gonna be good right from the start

He is behind me, isn't he?

And stay there until I bring your leash

Venus in Furs (1969) a.k.a Paroxismus

  A jazz musician witnesses the assault of a young woman at a millionaire's party. The next day, he finds her dead at the beach and confused, he leaves for Rio where he lives with a young female singer. Unexpectedly, he meets a woman much like the victim and he starts to pursue her to find out who she is...
  When heavy psychoactive substances interact with a flow of smooth jazz and Jess Franco interferes, then you get something like this film. The lack of exact continuity creates a mood of trippy haze and with the nostalgic and sensual scenes that only Franco can create, Venus in Furs is sure to take you away from your personal and into another. 60's, drugs, parties, music and travels...
  The cast is, as usual in early Franco's films, totaly off the hook. Maria Rohm, Barbara McNair, James Darren and Klaus Kinski giving a truly great dramatic performance. Grasping the dopy mood of the film from the balls, the actors dive themselves so deep in their characters that it is like like living the experience in reality.
Must watch this : on a Saturday, right before you go to a house party, with a glass of Southern Comfort. At the party, try to get as wasted as you can and don't leave until someone is dead or it is already 12 of the next morning. In the early morning hours that everyone is exhausted and wasted, set the mood with that jammy shit and some joints.
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0064789/

Naked already? It must be my lucky day!

Jammin' dat trumpet

Oh, snap! Not again!

Daughter of Dracula (1972) a.ka La Fille de Dracula

  Upon seeing her grandmother dying, Luisa is told of her family's curse ; they are all vampires. To settle her grief, Luisa decides to stay in the family estate with her uncle and her cousin. Soon she will find out that she can't run away from her family's curse...
  The old and tricky Jess Franco we all love strikes back! European finesse and glamor meets a classic horror story with a saucy and sexy twist. This film is highly atmospheric and trippy so be careful not to dive too deep in unknown waters. Gloomy castles, picturesque countryside and weird families with even more weird secrets. With proper amounts of carefully handled nudity and pinches of pure exploitation, this is another must-watch by the notorious Franco!
  Britt Nichols, Howard Vernon, Anne Libert and Alberto Dalbés. A classic Franco cast in classic combination. All great actors grasping the story and mood of the film by the balls and shoving heavily psychedelic drugs down its throat. Enjoy with caution.
Must watch this : with a clear mind at first but then be sure to do something that will cloud your senses and let your swim into the perverted lake of dreams that is Franco's films! Accompany with a company in an equal state of mind.
Preview
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0068583/

I am a what...?

And there I was, man. Going down massively on this chick. And, then she bites my neck, man...

Let's make out by these tombs...Far-out!

A Virgin Among the Living Dead (1973) a.k.a La nuit des étoiles filantes

  A girl arrives to France from London in order to be present at her dead father's will reading. She visits her long-lost relatives and just when she decided to stay with them, unusual things start to happen. She is tortured by strange visions and nightmares including lesbian love and satanic rituals with her a sacrifice. A big secret is about to be disclosed...
  Jess Franco in da house and he is about to fuck your brains out. Without protection! Straight from the abyssal depths of Franco's imagination, comes this fine piece of Eurosleaze and Eurohorror sexploitation. French mood in the air combined with spooky castle sets and acting from beyond the realms of reality! Yikes, I feel the chills even now!
  The usual Franco cast in new adventures for the not-easily-offended! Christina von Blanc as Christina (!), the young daughter of the deceased man. Britt Nichols, Rosa Palomar, Anne Libert gather up to complete the female cast and damn they are horrifyingly hot! Psycho Howard Vernon is the uncle you don't want to have as a relative but he is there, condemning your existence at family dinners!
Must watch this : with a girl and only the light from some lit red candles. You have to have sex after the film (it is Jess Franco so if you don't you disrespect him). Have the film playing again in mute, blast that unholly shit and go nuts!
Trailer
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0066914/

Such lips!

I got 99 problems but money ain't one

Hey, I was watching you sleep. You sleep so hot!